I am God

Version in Serbian language – https://dmilenkovic.wordpress.com/2011/08/21/ja-sam-bog/

I am God. But you can call me however you like. I had so many names so far, that I’ve stopped remembering them. Each name gave me different qualities. It’s entertaining for me to watch them imaging me, and arrogating. And when they arrogate me, then they praise and worship me. It’s very common for them to admire their works as if they are not. Irony and sarcasm, isn’t it? Oh well, let the kids play. I’ve let them write various Bibles, Qurans and similar fairytales. Do not relate me to such texts, I could be insulted. Do you really think that I would try to fix what can’t be fixed? Am I the one to point out the sins, thoughts and conduct? That’s all the fun! It would be boring! Besides, I am not so powerful as they represent me. I’ve never could against Alexander, Caesar, Napoleon, von Bismarck or Hitler. Neither against Popes or Imams.  I could never paint the Sistine, or compose the Ninth. And Ronaldinho would broke my spine[i], no doubt. If I would ever stand in front of him, of course. But I would like to talk about arrogation. I’ve noticed that I am the most powerful in their hands. They preach – “God will do that…God thinks like that…God doesn’t allow you that…” I feel so powerful then. Until I realize that my hands are tied. “God created us, and all around us!” they say. Egocentrism is destroying them. If they are bored, and they need to be entertained, it doesn’t mean that I had been bored too so I needed to create their world to entertain myself. I am satisfied with the existence. Oh well, let the kids play. For real, their world wouldn’t exist without me. That’s why I’m God.

I am God. I can tell you that I will lie to you, then lie to you and ultimately convince you that I’ve told you the true. I can look in to your eyes and find out everything that you don’t want to tell me. I could elicit your smile when you cry so much that hurts, hurts everything that cannot be seen or touched. I have a power to make people happy. I have a higher power – to choose whom to make happy. I have a power to destroy your life. I have a higher power – never to wish for that. My hand can heal. No one has ever read anything from my eyes. I hide my secrets like they didn’t exist. In fact, they don’t. Don’t they? It is easy to love me. For I always give little and ask for all. One of a kind that’s easiest to love. You will meet me sometime, and I will tell you – “Give yourself to me, completely.” And you will say – “I will, but tell me what would you give to me?” “I will give you a few days of happiness, several moments of ecstasy and attempt of freedom.” And you will give yourself to me, more then I’ve asked you to give. Cause they always do.

I am God. I am immortal. Even thou I left the Living a long time ago, I’ve never stopped living. I am God. For I changed everything. I held the world in my hands. I had worshiped the gods, until people started worshiping me. I destroyed boundaries between men. I shared my dream that all men should live together, in peace and harmony. I taught them. They followed me. My name became eternal. I walked the earth giving life to men. And when I left this world, I’ve shined more than for life. My idea spreads throughout the world, still. My idea shapes your world. In fact, from history through your birth until your life – everything is part of My world. Everything around you and inside of you is creature of My world. For I still hold the world in my hands. I am motivation, desire, excuse, justification, path, salvation, doctrine, guiding, beginning and end…I am All. I am the line between We and They. “We” are mine, “They” are not mine. But again, “They” will always be just the ones who are not “We”. Get it? I am positive of negative, and negative of positive.

“I am Alexander. And you are God. My name will see the end of this world. My name pervades everything, forever. You don’t have your name, or you have so many names that you’ve forgotten most of them. Your names will be extinguished and forgotten, while my name stands. Alexander. Alexander the Great, one and only, the greatest. And you are Zeus, Perun, Thor, Yahweh, Allah, Jesus, Buddha, Vishnu, Baal, Amun… I can list for a long long time. I alone prayed to dozens of your names…both male and female. But I am Alexander. I could choose who would live and who would die. For this world, I was the guiding star to follow. They could see me, touch me and ask for my advice. They are afraid of you, not me. Get it? THEY ARE AFRAID OF YOU!! And one doesn’t fear from good things. They respect, praise and worship me… I have to admit, while I was down there I had to be cruel occasionally. Sometimes I would pour out my wrath on those who had deceived or betrayed me. I hate injustice and evil. But I was also merciful to those who were against me. Mercy and wrath… sounds familiar? While I was walking the earth, I wanted to unite the world. You are only dividing it, constantly.  I am Alexander, and you are God. When they needed food, they would look at me not you. When they needed land, they would look at me not you. When they needed water, they would look at me not you. When they needed hope, they would look at me, not you. When they needed tomorrow, they would look at me not you. I am Alexander and you are God… or vice versa?”

I am Goddess. And I am gorgeous. I am peak of pleasure and non possession. World is spinning around me. Since beginning they associate me to curse. They say that I am cursed for those whom I give and for those whom I don’t give. For they envy to whom I give, and one envy if he was not given. Vanity is curse, not me. Vanity is my archenemy, who stumbles me on every step. Well, shall remain so forever…cause the ones that stumbles are ones that you trample. They also call me Beauty, or Aesthetics. I am the greatest Divinity of your existence. I am in every cause and every consequence of your life. For I am peak of pleasure and non possession. I am not asking you to worship me, to obey or bow. I am not asking you anything! I am Goddess who gives. That is why they worship me, and bow to me. I walk this earth and beautify the existence. I give meaning to things that didn’t have it, I give will to live to those who didn’t have it. Do not believe others, I am the greatest motivation. For the greatest aspiring is pleasure. And I am the peak of pleasure. Look for me everywhere, but do not see me through vanity. Even when I am, often, dressed in Arrogance. Allow me to please you, to give you without asking anything in return. For, I contemplate, what’s the kind of God who trades service for service? What is he who ask in order to give? I think you call him Merchandiser.

No! Do not mistake me for Sun, ignorant! Sun is my apprentice…who is a good learner.

I am God. They love me, giving me their love unselfishly. I have enough love for whole world. I feel love in motions, dream it in series, see it in nature and people. Love moves me, and I wish to share that with others, to move them and set them free. I have never done any harm to anyone. I love doing good deeds and staying away from bad ones. Although they’ve sometimes thought badly of me, or talked badly, I’ve always returned with a smile and understanding. For I know that they are blinded, and they need me to enlighten them. For I am God. I understand both good and bad, serene and wrathful, rich and poor, both beautiful and ugly…I have understanding for the whole world. Everyone has a privilege to enjoy and duty not to withhold that to others. I teach them to act and think like that, cause it will be better for all. I wish everyone to be happy. I am happy when they are happy. That’s the basic postulate of harmony. I tell them – “Be happy for others! For happiness is like perfume. If you are near, you have to smell.” That’s why I love sharing happiness. For I can…for I am God. And sorrow is inevitable. If there wasn’t for sorrow, they wouldn’t know what is happiness, wouldn’t they? That’s the reason why I disappoint occasionally…never intentionally, never deliberately. I have never told a lie, cause truth is sanctity. Still, I don’t take amiss on their lies. Small or big, intentional or accidental, first or others…they are all the same. They bother me, and disappoint me sometimes, but I understand them. Though, everybody will respond for their own lies, sooner or later. They are just humans, and I am God, and they will never be like me. But they shall strive. I am free. I walk these roads freely, without restriction. I can do whatever I want, without hurting the others. The world is mine, because I am free. I look where I want, I talk what I want, I go where I want, I stop when I want, I swim when I want, I fly when I want…because I am Free. That’s why I’m god…because I am Free.

I am God. Confidently walking the paths. I enjoy bird tweets, waterfalls, verdure of forests…in everything that nature created. You wonder, wasn’t I the one who created all that?

No, I contemplated, imagined and comprehended. Nature created.

[i] “Broke my spine” – literal translation from Serbian. It is used in Serbian football slang to describe a player’s dribble that was so good, that defender didn’t have any chance of stopping him.

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